Ajay - On the Road called Life!

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Police were called to a day care, where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
To write with a broken [...]

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time…. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2 People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T. V. [...]

AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.
BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass.
CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of the Parish to lip-sync.
HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.
HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves higher than that of the congregation’s range.
RECESSIONAL [...]

My Dad sent me an email today of an online system to address grievances in India. The mail goes like this:
Can you imagine this happening in INDIA ?
Government of India has an online Grievance forum at http://darpg-grievance.nic.in/
The government wants people to use this tool to highlight the problems they faced while dealing with Government officials [...]

It’s amazing, you will understand the above word by the end of the conversation…
Read aloud for best results. “Tendjewberrymud” Be warned, you’re going to find yourself talking “funny” for a while after reading this.
The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published [...]

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:
‘Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.
After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have [...]

Have you ever watched kids
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to the rain
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?
You better slow down.
Don’t dance so fast.
Time is short.
The music won’t last.
Do you run through each day
On the fly?
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear the reply?
When the [...]

Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you’ll have to pee.
Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of Probability:
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.
Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a [...]