Christmas is coming! Here are some jokes to liven up the spirit. Picked these up from DistantHelp Forums, where I am a moderator.
What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective ?
Santa Clues !Father Christmas wins a saucepan in a competition.
Now thats what you call pot luck !What do the reindeer sing to Father Christmas on his birthday ?
Freeze a jolly good fellow !What do you call a man who claps at Christmas ?
Santapplause !Twinkle Twinkle chocolate bar
Santa drives a rusty car
Press the starter
Press the choke
Off he goes in a cloud of smoke !Who delivers presents to baby sharks at Christmas ?
Santa Jaws !Why does Father Christmas like to work in the garden ?
Because he likes to hoe, hoe, hoe !Why is a cat on a beach like Christmas ?
Because they both have “Sandy claws” !What does Father Christmas call his money ?
Iced lolly ?What’s Father Christmas called when he takes a rest while delivering presents ?
Santa pause !What beats his chest and swings from Christmas cake to Christmas cake?
Tarzipan !Mum, Can I have a dog for Christmas ?
No you can have turkey like everyone else !What did the eskimos sing when they got there Christmas dinner ?
“Whalemeat again, don’t know where, don’t know when ” !What did the big cracker say to the little cracker ?
My pop is bigger than yours !Who is never hungry at Christmas ?
The turkey – he’s always stuffed !What bird has wings but cannot fly ?
Roast turkey !Whats the best thing to put into a Christmas cake ?
Your teeth !We had grandma for Christmas dinner ?
Really, we had turkey !Whats happens if you eat the Christmas decorations ?
You get tinsel-itus !What do vampires put on their turkey at Christmas ?
Grave-y !
