• Forwards,  Jokes

    English at its worst!

    =========================================== “Wind is running..open the window and let the air force come in” =========================================== Teacher asked one of his student when he was cooking… Teacher: Son, what are you constructing? Student: Sir, i am building food =========================================== Principal to student?” I saw you yesterday rotating near girls hostel pulling cigarette? ? ” =========================================== Class teacher once said : ” Pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!” =========================================== A Hindi teacher once said?.”I’m going out of the world to America..” =========================================== “..DON’T TRY TO TALK IN FRONT OF MY BACK..” =========================================== “dont..laugh at the back benches?otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down?..” =========================================== It was very hot in…

  • Forwards,  Jokes,  Quotes

    English is a Funny Language – Part III

    Did you like the post And you thought English was easy? Well, here is Part III in the series English is a Funny Language. Read Part I and Part II. Before further ado… here’s some more phrases a lexophile would love: A seamstress, and a sewer, fell down into a sewer line. After a number of Novocain injections, my jaw got number. At the Army base, a bass was painted on the head of a bass drum. He could lead, if he would get the lead out. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend? I did not object to the object. I had to subject the subject…

  • Forwards,  Jokes

    And you thought English was easy!

    Got this forward about the English language. We will begin with a box, and the plural is boxes.. But the plural of ox became oxen not oxes, One fowl is a goose, and two are called geese. Yet, the plural of moose should never be meese. You may find a lone mouse, or a nest full of mice. Yet, the plural of house is houses, not hice. If the plural of man is always called men, Why shouldn’t the plural of pan be called pen? If I spoke of my foot, and show you my feet, Then if I give you a boot, would a pair be called beet? If…

  • Lexophile
    Forwards,  Fun Stuff,  Jokes

    42 phrases a lexophile would love

    1. I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me. 2. Police were called to a day care, where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. 3. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He’s all right now. 4. The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference. 5. To write with a broken pencil is pointless. 6. When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate. 7. The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large. 8. A thief who stole a calendar… got twelve months. 9. A thief fell and broke his leg…

  • Forwards,  Jokes

    Tendjewberrymud…

    It’s amazing, you will understand the above word by the end of the conversation… Read aloud for best results. “Tendjewberrymud” Be warned, you’re going to find yourself talking “funny” for a while after reading this. The following is a telephone exchange between a hotel guest and room-service at a hotel in Asia, which was recorded and published in the FarEast Economic Review… Room Service (RS): “Morny. Ruin sorbees” Guest (G): “Sorry, I thought I dialled room-service” RS: “Rye.. Ruin sorbees.. morny! Djewish to odor sunteen??” G: “Uh.. yes.. I’d like some bacon and eggs” RS: “Ow July den?” G: “What??” RS: “Ow July den?… pry, boy, pooch? G : “Oh,…

  • Forwards,  Fun Stuff,  Jokes

    English is a Funny Language – Part II

    If you enjoyed my previous post on English, then I’m sure this is going to tickle your linguistic buds. English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t…

  • Forwards,  Fun Stuff

    English is a Funny Language

    If you thought, you were really good at English, especially in your pronunciations, then how about giving this a shot? The bandage was wound around the wound. The farm was used to produce produce. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse . We must polish the Polish furniture. He could lead if he would get the lead out. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.…

  • Computers & Technology

    Ajay D’Souza – Netvibes Translator

    Had expressed interest in translating Netvibes. Got the invitation today for the same. The languages available are Hindi, Marathi and Tamil. However, the catch is that the language has to be in written in their respective fonts. Well I don’t know Tamil so that rules it out and my Marathi could well do with some brushing up. So I have started translating the Hindi portion, atleast whatever I am able to so far. I was able to find a good English to Hindi font, so to say website called QuillPad. It works via phonetics. e.g. you can type kya kar rahe hain aap? which means What are you doing? and…

  • Forwards,  Jokes

    Want to learn Mumbai Hindi?

    So have you decided to shift to Mumbai? Or maybe you just want to talk the talk. Read on and learn… English: There’s a minor problem Hindi: Arre yaar, “Waanda” ho gaya English: There’s a big problem Hindi: Arre yaar, “Zol” ho gaya English: There’s a huge problem Hindi: Arre yaar, “Raada” ho gaya English: You’ll be surprised . Hindi: Ekdam “Hill” jayega tu English: I am going out of this place Hindi: Chal apun “Kaltii” marta hai. English: Don’t make a fool of others Hindi: Dekh, Tu “Shendi” mat laga sabko

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