After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Sainsbury’s. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women – she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Sainsbury’s… Dear Mrs. D’Souza, Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. D’Souza, are listed below and are “documented by our video surveillance cameras”: 1.…
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London update
Finally got a day to myself and hence the point of this post. Ideally, by now, you should be able to see a million photographs on my photo album on Facebook. However, a total lack of social life explains the un-updated album! Since then, I have been slogging like crazy at work with minimal amount of fun. In the last 6 weeks I have: Worked almost every weekend and almost every day till at least 11pm Watched Robin Hood Went to Piccadilly Circus area and had amazing pizza at an Italian restaurant Shifted residence, well, almost And, that’s about it. There is one bit of good news though, my original…
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Give this image a title
You can have tonnes of interpretations for this image. Comment below and tell me your title.
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Slow Dance
Have you ever watched kids On a merry-go-round? Or listened to the rain Slapping on the ground? Ever followed a butterfly’s erratic flight? Or gazed at the sun into the fading night? You better slow down. Don’t dance so fast. Time is short. The music won’t last. Do you run through each day On the fly? When you ask How are you? Do you hear the reply? When the day is done Do you lie in your bed With the next hundred chores Running through your head? You’d better slow down Don’t dance so fast. Time is short. The music won’t last. Ever told your child, We’ll do it tomorrow?…
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English is a Funny Language – Part II
If you enjoyed my previous post on English, then I’m sure this is going to tickle your linguistic buds. English is a crazy language. There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren’t invented in England or French fries in France . Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren’t sweet, are meat. We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t…
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English is a Funny Language
If you thought, you were really good at English, especially in your pronunciations, then how about giving this a shot? The bandage was wound around the wound. The farm was used to produce produce. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse . We must polish the Polish furniture. He could lead if he would get the lead out. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.…
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Dead People and Credit Cards
Received this as a forward. I don’t know how far this is true… but it sure was fun reading! Be sure and cancel your credit cards before you die. This is so priceless, and so easy to see happening, customer service being what it is today. A lady died this past January, and The Bank billed her for February March for their annual service charges on her credit card, added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance of $0, is now somewhere around $60. A Family Member placed a call to The Bank. Here is the exchange: Family Member: “I am calling to tell you she died…
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It’s Time To Quit If…
An amazing slideshow from Forbes.com
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Can you solve the mystery of the missing $1?
I had solved a similar one like this many years ago and I received this via a forward. How many of you can solve this mystery 😀 ? So here goes… Three friends went to a hotel and drew up a bill of $75/- Each contributed $25/- towards this and the waiter took the bill to the cashier. For some reason unknown, our dear friend the cashier decided to give them a discount and asked the waiter to return $5/-. Now the waiter was confused. He thought, “How to distribute $5 among 3 persons? ” So he kept $2 in his pocket & gave one dollar to each one of…
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So how different are Men and Women?
Well it is obvious. Man and women are different. Here is an amusing look at these differences. 1. NAMES: If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara. If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy. 2. EATING OUT: When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw ina $20, even though it’s only for $32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want the change back. When the women get their bill, out come the…
