English at its worst!

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“Wind is running..open the window and let the air force come in”

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Teacher asked one of his student when he was cooking…

Teacher: Son, what are you constructing?
Student: Sir, i am building food

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Principal to student?” I saw you yesterday rotating near girls hostel
pulling cigarette? ? ”

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Class teacher once said :

” Pick up the paper and fall in the dustbin!!!”

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A Hindi teacher once said?.”I’m going out of the world to America..”

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“..DON’T TRY TO TALK IN FRONT OF MY BACK..”

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“dont..laugh at the back benches?otherwise teeth and all will be fallen down?..”

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It was very hot in the afternoon when the teacher entered.. She tried
to switch the fan on, but there was some problem. and then she said:

” why is fan not oning” (ing form of on)

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Teacher in a furious mood?

“Write down your name and father of your name!!”

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“Shhh? quiet? the principal is revolving around college”

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My manager started like this

“Hi, I am Ali, Married with two kids”

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“I’ll illustrate what I have in my mind” said the professor and erased the board

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“Will you hang that calendar or else I’ll HANG MYSELF”

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LIBRARIAN scolding: ” IF YOU WILL TALK AGAIN , I WILL KNEEL DOWN OUTSIDE”

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Chemistry head of department comes and tells us?

“My aim is to study my son and marry my daughter”

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“Tomorrow call your parents especially mother and father”

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“Why are you looking at the monkeys outside when i am in the class?!”

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Lab assistant said this when my friend wrote wrong code..

“I understand. You understand. Computer how understand??”

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Seeing the principal passing by, the teacher told the noisy class..

“Keep quiet, the principal has passed away”

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“Take a copper wire of any material….”

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“I have two daughters. Both are girls”

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Prof had to deal with a couple of noisy backbenchers –

Walked up to the noisiest fellow & crooked a finger:
“You, sir, please to be following me”

He led the chap just outside the class, promptly did an about-face and
told the fellow:

“Now, don’t follow me!” and walked back into class….

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